Dear Potential Client,

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When I first sat down to write a “get to know me” section, I started by listing my degrees and specialties.  If that’s what you’re looking for, it's at the bottom of the page.  But it didn’t feel like me to start with it.  It’s probably not what you really want to know about me.  It’s not the first thing I’d want to know about my potential therapist.  You’re probably wondering, “Who’s this person who claims she can help me?  What can I expect from her?  Why should I trust her with my innermost thoughts and feelings?”  So, let’s start there. 

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People often ask why I chose this profession.  It’s a fair question and my answer is simple:  I genuinely like connecting with people and have always been incredibly curious about the world around me.  I’ve also experienced several relationships that irrevocably changed me for the better.  I wanted to pay that forward by offering a relationship that can help someone else. 

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People also often want to know what type of therapy I practice. I could give my answer in technical terms, like relational-cultural, interpersonal, and cognitive-behavioral approaches.  But what does that actually mean?  At their core, they all involve a unique kind of relationship where we’ll do a particular kind of talking.  At this point you might be asking, “Well, how exactly is talking going to help me?”  You probably do it all the time, right?  But I don't mean the kind of talking you do with a friend over lunch.  I mean the kind of talking where someone is really listening in order to understand and accept you as fully as possible.  How often do you have a conversation with someone who’s totally focused on knowing the most authentic version of you?  Most of us are lucky to have a few relationships like this in our lifetime.  Yet, for most people, this doesn’t happen very often.

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You still may not feel quite sure about how this kind of conversation could help you.  If so, indulge me for a moment by imagining all the things you might learn about yourself as we explore how you’ve been shaped by your experiences, identities, feelings, and beliefs.  I'm going to invite you to talk and think about your life in ways that you may not have before.  Because I'm such a curious person and I genuinely want to know you, I'm going to ask you a lot of questions along the way.  My guess is that people don’t often ask you the types of questions I'm going to ask.  Maybe you haven’t yet even asked them of yourself.  Think about what you might discover when someone is really trying to know you in this way.  You could know yourself more fully and discover the innate wisdom that I already know you have.  And this wisdom could ultimately lead to your healing.

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Yet, being fully known to ourselves and others can feel outright terrifying for many of us.  If that’s how you feel, it’s totally normal.  Because maybe somewhere along the way you started to believe that you needed to be someone different in order to be good enough.  I call that “shame” and it can wreak havoc in our lives.  But who’s voice is that actually?  Do you want to accept it as your own?  And do you really want fear and shame influencing your decisions?  That’s part of what we’re going to try to figure out.  It’s going to take both of us being totally honest with each other.  It’s going to take some risks and discomfort.  I’m going to challenge you to take action and make changes based on what we learn about you.  It’s going to be hard work.  But you can count on me to show up, especially when it’s hard.  And we’ll be together when it pays off.

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If that sounds like the kind of relationship and change you want, I might be the right therapist for you.  I’ll be here when you’re ready to find out.  

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With Warmth,

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Annalucia Bays, Ph.D.